It's been quiet around here lately. Why is that? Because I kind of suck a lot.
so yeah, not the best way to start off the first post in almost a month. And not a great way to get the positive feelings going. But here's a series of confessions for you:
-I haven't been to the gym since I last posted, I don't think.
-I haven't been eating so great since I last posted, I don't think.
-I haven't been feeling so great.
-I'm sure I've gained weight.
I haven't gotten to the gym thanks to a series of excuses; I'm tired, I don't feel like it, I'm exhausted, I worked today, I work tomorrow, I work early, I haven't slept, I can't find my pants (but in truth, I never looked for them, either). I haven't eaten very well...much for those same excuses, just nix the pants part.
I've been depressed partially because of the lack of exercise and care for my health, partially because I've been in a lot of pain (see that whole lack of gym visits part), partially because of work and partially because I have problems controlling my emotions.
It just seems like everything's gone wrong lately and that I can't doa nything to get it back on track. Tomorow after work though, I'm going to look for my pants. And I'm going to the gym.
Today, I'll wallow. I'll do whatever it is that I think I need to make myself feel better. Frankly, if I started today, I think I might break down. But sulking will happen for the rest of the night and tomorrow I'll wake up and realize, yeah, sure, I can do something about this. I just need to actually try doing something about it.
